It’s
another Sunday evening and the weekend draws to a close. This weekend I was supposed
to visit a concert together with an ex but the concert was cancelled and
instead we decided to go ahead with the meeting and I booked myself into the
same hotel. Yet another ex from across the border. So I arrived late afternoon
yesterday and after we said our hi and hello’s, I head to my room to unpack and
after we met for dinner.
It’s been a
good 12 years since I left the place we called home and never looked back, as
too many things had happened. The life we had together was ruined and he was
the one to blame, this time there were no two parties to blame, none of that. As
is normal after a breakup we had there are a lot of things you just want to
throw at him, and I don’t only mean words. My happy life was ruined and I had
to pack up and go. Leave the country and prepare for a new start.
More than 12
years passed and the words that I wanted to say or the questions I wanted to
ask have gone too. As friends we met and started talking and we had a great
weekend. Looking at him I even wondered what I found attractive about him many
years ago, other than the hairy chest. It too it seemed to have disappeared. Yes
he looks the same after all these years but the magic did wear off. Big time. So
it is true love has an expiring time and his one is up. He changed and in a
good way I must say, but no more Disney effects, and I had such fond memories
of them. I use to find him sexy whatever he was wearing and it felt great
having him near. But all was gone faded
with time, left was a friend, and yes I can call him friend now. We shared
memories and enjoyed spending time together while walking in Amsterdam. As friends
do.
It made me
again think about relationships and the thing we call love, proven many times it
just might not be forever. Some things are and remain a fairytale, there is a
reason for that. So what’s next? Well some have a neighbor over for the extreme
cuddle but who has to leave for guest, others stay the night but need to be
gone before breakfast. And some well some can hang on for a little longer, but
in the end I will never promise again it will be forever.
My young
friends might not always hit the jackpot but they do dream, sometimes about the
forever love and sometimes just about another neighbor, but the keep on
dreaming, I applaud that whole heartily. They are ever more part of my story and my
view of the world. My world, well it’s never a dull moment, not with them. We might
not call every week but they remain only a thought away. They make it possible
to look forward into this multi colored world and make me smile and sometimes
wonder how they will make it to the next week with their new love interest. In the
end it doesn’t stop them trying or me writing, I might even give them some
sound advice or be the one that listen to them, but I do love them, each in
their own way. After a weekend like this one I noticed that one changed from
lover and partner to a friend, and loving a friends is so much more ecofriendly
in the end, they might sometimes hurt you a little, but they also know how to
make up, and once in my heart they are safe, and I have changed into a more
forgiving person, and I am glad for it. The hurt has been enough over the
years, why keep thinking of that negative thing that happened to end a
relationship, a few years of happiness. I count my blessings and my great years
with them all, friends and lovers for they made memorable moments, so many of
them.
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