a love letter long due

What is love? This question haunts the human psyche perhaps more persistently than any other. It has occupied our collective imagination for millennia, it has baffled scientists, taunted philosophers, and tantalized artists. So mystified by love were the Ancient Greeks that they itemized six types of it. But nothing defines it with more exquisite expressiveness than the love letter. At its best, it makes the personal universal, then personal again — a writer from another era or another culture captures the all-consuming complexity of love with more richness and color and dimension than we ourselves could, making us feel at once less alone and more whole in our understanding of love and of ourselves. So where is the app for it?

It has been a very long time since my last love letter, writing and receiving. Feels like ages ago. I wonder if I still can….. Maybe I should just give it a try, call it practice, just for the fun of it. Remembering how it made me feel writing one. Let me first picture my (imaginary man). Okay let’s give it a try,

My love,

For this moment only, I have come to realize, I want to give you, the miracle that's mine to give, my love. It’s the time to write and ask you this as time is passing me by and I want to waste no more, so there are a few things I want to ask you. Will you be there, for the rest of my time, make me a home?
Will you stay there and let your heart follow mine so it feels like we will be together for a moment that will feel eternally, and hold me for this moment only.

When I look at you I look at all that is good and safe in my world, a world where I used to fight my own battles and stood my ground. The moment I met you I felt like I could stand stronger with you, time was on my side that single moment I first looked into your eyes. Yes, it’s something surreal and might be straight out of a movie script, but I have learned to not underestimate moments.

The following weeks where we started to see more of each other started off a friendship, which became stronger with each passing moment together. The movies we went to, the dinners we had, the walks in the park, the times I looked into your eyes and for a moment drifted somewhere where time stood simply still. The time I noticed eyes can truly smile. It is safe to say we both know and feel there is something, something I would like to give a name and purpose.

Have you ever loved someone that makes you go silent when there should be words, where you do almost anything just to look into his eyes? Closed your eyes and dreamed he would be there, to try to find the words to explain it all?

What do I got to do to get you into my arms, to get you into my world, because thinking of you can’t make me sleep. I am trying to find those words but every time we speak they seem to don’t come out right.

I wonder what to say next or not to do, afraid of making a mistake, to keep you as a friend and to become my lover, it's tough this love thing. Even more when in the middle of the night all I can think of is you, does this has to be this tough? With only one heart it seems there are a thousand pieces that would come together and beat stronger because you would be in it, they are shouting out for more of you.

We have had a few months where we talked about all that is important, funny and even sad in and about our lives, so say something, I will be the one if you want me too.

There is no place I would not follow you, for now I am feeling so small, I am still learning to love, I need you to say something. In a way I am sorry I couldn’t get to you the last time we met, my feelings were fighting with my thoughts and in the end words were lost.

You got on the train and I waved goodbye after that simple kiss that still lingers on my cheek. I hate to see you leave and the same time it makes me happy because I get to say hello, again and again.

Here’s my letter to you in words I could not say, the words important for you to know, and I can’t wait for that moment, that one moment only to be with you and call you; “my love”.

so there it is, i wonder if it would do the trick. Maybe one day i will find out.....