a sexy brain, food for thought

Lazy Sunday,

where i should have been up early to head to the gym, i ended up having breakfast in the kitchen while watching Ally McBeal. Not that I didn't do anything, I cleaned the kitchen while enjoying a few episodes.

Outside it is to cold and too grey, I can hardly be motivated after a busy week to go somewhere to do something. I wasn't even motivated to stay in bed longer, my ipad being on 6% of its power may have motivated me to get out and do something.

American pancakes were my comfort setting to start this Sunday and I wonder if I am going to see some of the promised sunshine today.

I had forgotten how much I liked to watch this series, with all its quirky persona and scenes. “a good thing of walking alone at the end of the day, you have the time to reflect and think what happened..... “; it indeed is one of the positive things about it. Being single you actually have all day for these thoughts.

The last week was another busy one and for someone who plans his week, this was one where my plans needed to change frequently. My working days got longer and I didn't go to bed nearly early enough to get enough sleep. My intention to go to the gym was crushed by Thursday, I am just to swamped to go after worked and traveling to and from it, even more as work related issues still are running through my brain.

Tried to pick up my Spanish classes all week and I failed, miserably.

Thank god, apple, or Microsoft for modern technology to communicate, but even with Skype or face time the hours seem to fly. To much to do and not enough time or energy.

So many things happen in a week that processing it mentally becomes an extra job as well. Wonder what it is that young people get the urge around this time a year to go out and look for butterflies (the stomach ones). Wanting something lasting, romantically and full of joy and oh yes, sex.

They seem to take rejection so much harder these months before summer. They are much more flexible when they are in the same mood around Christmas, might just be my thought and interpretation, but still.

Is there truly too much pressure on the folks? Lately I have been kind of counseling a few youngsters and the feeling of being rejected really seems to hurt them, whether it be in there pride or manliness, but their rejection feels so much more as it actually is, it just make me wonder.

When you go out on a single date, and it doesn’t work out, should you doubt yourself immediately?

I see no reason for it, but these guys start asking themselves questions they should save till they are at least well in their fifties. They are all young, free, fit and each of them in their own way attractive. With one you might notice his smile, the other his abs, where as the youngest has a killer smile. In the end the feel its just not enough, enough of what? Seeing them and knowing them, each one is special, its just amazing how bad they see themselves, they should have a mirror to have a truly good look, and see that they do matter in this world. They may never become the new Einstein, or win a Oscar or a Pulitzer, but they are human and they matter somewhere in someones life, be it a friend a lover or a reason to merely smile.

One of them has what I call a sexy brain, and he might laugh about it, but in a very weird way that is an amazing gift. In his youthfulness he is powered with an amazing gift. Sure he knows it, but when his hormones kick in so does the other half of the brain that reacts his age. A wonderful experience to see someone tease your process of thinking to go, in a blink of an eye to a hormonal steam engine full throttle ahead, to a steamy night, afternoon or morning, with one or more good looking counterparts. This is the stuff good books and stories are about. When we talk about his adventures he is an amazing guy and as most of our conversations are via whats app or an other profile based app, he can not see me smile or hear me laugh out loud. Some of these hook-ups are giving me stuff to wanna write, and they help me to look at the world with different eyes. They surely helped me to look at things that bothered me at first in a more distant way, and accept that people do live this way, even when it is still not “my way”, but in the end I do not get hurt in the process, I actually learn to understand the next generation a bit better. Still not agreeing with them, but I do not need to do so, I can be sarcastic about it, disagreeing or laughing but it colors the world around me so much more, and I see it with humor I did not have before. We always talk about live and let live, but how many actually do? When it comes to this subject, others I might still be a little medieval as my sister says. But that’s not the issue now.

With my younger “friends” life became truly more to look at, and learn, as I happily do. I listen and when they ask I hope I can give them a opinion or answer they need whether they want it or not. Trying to modernize my my way of thinking without leaving the road I am on, I still have and want to keep my principals.

Thank god for little amazing adults wannabees...... they are not keeping me sexy, skinny or young, but they tickle my brain to keep active and pay attention, they find in me a grateful listener and a happy one too.